The entire relationship with the narcissist is intended to recreate the dynamics of the conflict with the narcissist’s mother during his formative years - but this time around with a different outcome and different power matrix: successful separation-individuation via the twin acts of devaluation and discard from an empowered position.
How does the narcissist attempt to bring these outcomes about?
In narcissistic abuse, the narcissist acts as a ventriloquist: he animates the internal object that represents the victim and misattributes to it his own voice (self-gaslighting via attribution error).
The external object (the actual partner) is erased and supplanted by an introject which acts as a self-object or object representation.
The narcissist also usurps the roles of harsh inner critic, sadistic superego, and rigid conscience in his victim.
Using entraining, the narcissist takes over the victim’s ego boundary functions and becomes her external locus of control. He assigns to her the roles of victim and mother in his script.
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